please help

i saw your picture by mistake and i can't believe how much that hurt...

200 Nights

Well, well, well

Newseek has just published an article that goes into detail on how VP Cheney and his co-horts have been operating in office. I think it's very important that people know what's really going on in there. Please check it out at the following link and pass it along to your friends:

We got dooped!

EE Cummings

This poem reminds me of you...

29
If i have made, my lady, intricate
imperfect various things chiefly which wrong
your eyes (frailer than most deep dreams are frail)
songs less firm than your body's whitest song
upon my mind-if i have failed to snare
the glance too shy-if through my singing slips
the very skillful strangeness of your smile
the keen primeval silence of your hair

-let the world say "his most wise music
stole nothing from death"-

you only will create
(who are so perfectly alive) my shame:
lady through whose profound and fragile lips
the sweet smell clumsy feet of April came

into the ragged meadow of my soul.

yoooo

Yo Biz...

Plans

I went to see Death Cab For Cutie last night at the Hammerstein Ballroom in New York City. I have no pictures to prove it because they wouldn't let any cameras in. But I will say this, they put on one spectacular show. As much as I hate Hammerstein, Death Cab was able to get me out of that mood. They sound almost as they do on record, which I find to be amazing, esspecially since they are only a four peice; No backround muscians, just them. It was hot inside Hammerstein, but the chills I got from the music froze me up really quick. They did play my two favorite songs during the encore - Tiny Vessels and Transatlanticsm. What I didn't like was how Death Cabs new "big" label has them pushing the new record which meant playing mainly new songs. Thats bullshit. Anyway, it did get me back into concert mode and I wanna go see some shows. But shows where there are people throwing each other and moshing and pushing and crowd surfing. I hate standing up to watch an awesome band with no energy, no harm to Death Cab, of course. My legs and neck are a little stiff.

thanks

I just wanted to thank everybody for the birthday wishes.
So, thanks.

Happy Birthday Baby Boy

It is 12:15 on October 17th. It is my birthday. I've never been more sad in my entire life.

I don't want birthday wishes. I don't want to drink. I will just loath in this and another year alone.
This is my life.

Envy the rain, I doubt it

Stole this quote from Jamie's blog. I love it.

"“The intellectual is the worst thing there is. He invents things and then he believes them. He decides the novel is dead but then he finds a novel and says he discovered it. If you say the novel is dead, it is not the novel. It is you who are dead." Gabriel Garcia Ma¡rquez from an interview with William Kennedy

I was supposed to drive up to Buffalo tonight to see my god himself, Matthew Good, play. But the rain which hasn't stopped in over a week has kept me from the 5 1/2 hour trip. I'll have to wait a while till I can die.

Stephen Dunn

Here is some poetry by Stephen Dunn:

Desire:
I remember how it use to be
at noon, springtime, the city streets
full of office workers like myself
let loose from the cold
glass buildings on Park and Lex,
the dull swaddling of winter cast off,
almost everyone wanting
everyone else. It was amazing
how most of us contained ourselves,
bringing desire back up
to the office where it existed anyway,
quiet, like a good engine.
I'd linger a bit
with the receptionist,
knock on someone else's open door,
ease myself, by increments,
into the seriousness they paid me for.
Desire was everywhere those years,
so enormous it couldn't be reduced
one person at a time.
I don't remember when it was,
though closer to now than then,
I walked the streets desireless,
my eyes fixed on destination alone.
The beautiful person across from me
on the bus or train
looked like effort, work.
I translate her into pain.
For months I had the clarity
the cynical survive with,
their world so safely small.
Today, walking 57th toward 3rd,
it's all come back,
the interesting, the various,
the conjured life suggested by a glance.
I praise how the body heals itself.
I praise how, finally, it never learns.


In the house:
I am attracted by the dust
and silence of an upper shelf,
the strange air

that causes linoleum
to bulge in the cellar.
I know the walls come to hug

like grizzlies
if you stare at them too long,
and the kitchen knife

wants to be held.
I sense the aromas of sex,
the delicate, stale drift

of arguments and spite
no amount of cleaning will solve.
I know when love goes

it slips through all insulation,
forgets your name,
becomes sky.


Those of us who think we know:
Those of us who think we know
the same secrets
are silent together most of the time,
for us there is eloquence
in desire, and for a while
when in love and exhausted
it's enough to nod like shy horses
and come together
in a quiet ceremony of tongues

it's in disappointment we look for words
to convince us
the spaces between stars are nothing
to worry about,
it's when those secrets burst
in that emptiness between our hearts
and the lumps in our throats.
And the words we find are always insufficient, like love,
though they are often lovely
and all we have

Emily Dickinson - 165, Again

So I guess I fucked up pretty badly on my test. I got to revise it with my teacher and do it over. Here again, is the poem and the right inturpritation.

165
A Wounded Deer -- leaps highest --
I've heard the Hunter tell --
'Tis but the Ecstasy of death --
And then the Brake is still!

The Smitten Rock that gushes!
The trampled Steel that springs!
A Cheek is always redder
Just where the Hectic stings!

Mirth is the Mail of Anguish
In which it Cautious Arm,
Lest anybody spy the blood
And "you're hurt" exclaim!


The speaker uses a wounded deer as a metaphor in this poem. The deer, when it gets fatally shot, “leaps highest” because of “the extasy of death.” It knows it’s going to die and lets out its final gasp of life. Just like a chicken with its head cut off that runs around, gasping for life, and then comes to a stop, the deer falls and “the brake is still.”

The speaker shows three more examples of the metaphor in nature in the second stanza. “The smitten rock that gushes” refers to a stone. When it is “smitten,” for example, by a jackhammer or a sledgehammer, it “gushes” sort-of exploding; pieces of its shrapnel go everywhere. In the next line the speaker uses “trampled steel” as another example. A piece of steel that is laid out, when hit hard enough can “spring” back into its original shape. And the final example, the speaker uses a cheek of someone who has a fever. Usually, when we are sick, our complexion is pale and bland, but here “the cheek is always redder.” The speaker gives these three examples that back up the metaphor of the deer in the first stanza. But the metaphor of the deer seems to refer only to nature.

The third stanza talks about human pain. The first line “mirth is the mail of anguish,” translates into the unconscious and uncomfortable laughter used by people as a cover-up and as a shield for pain when our walls are up. In the second line, the writer puts up his “cautious arm” or armor, as protection of his emotions. The first two lines sport the façade of happiness, when in fact the person is suffering an immense deal of pain. The third line states “lest anybody spy the blood” referring to the concealed emotion. Unlike in nature and with animals, us humans are able to hide our emotion – pain and heartbreak – and cover it up with laughter and happiness, which is not real at all. Rather than blurting out “you’re hurt,” we repress our true feelings and keep them on the inside.

This last stanza can really refer to heartbreak because after you get hurt, you wonder, “how could I have been so stupid to let my guard down?” and you say you’ll never let it happen to you again. That’s when your guard comes up and repression of the pain happens. And because the pain of heartbreak is so excruciating, it is hard to let other people into your heart because you are so afraid of being hurt again. What this does, in turn, is it shuts out other people from getting into your heart, but it also keeps you lonely. So in a sense, it’s like a double-edged sword, because you’re in pain from heartbreak, but you’re also in pain from being lonely. This poem could also be the repression of heartbreak by the speaker.

This poem could also show the speaker, who is trying to penetrate the heart of the broken hearted - to find some kind of explanation for why they can’t be heard by them. They want to tell them “hey, I know your pain and I know what you’re going through, but I will not hurt you.” It shows their frustration because they feel could love the person only if they would open their heart back up.

Cool

I kept my mustache for 3 seconds just so I could take this picture:

Black

"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life



I know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky



But why can't it be mine?"



Black - Pearl Jam

My blog sux dick, pass it on

NADA SURF - POPULAR - HI/LOW

Three important rules for breaking up
Don't put off breaking up when you know you want to
Prolonging the situation only makes it worse
Tell him honestly, simply, kindly, but firmly
Don't make a big production
Don't make up an elaborate story
This will help you avoid a big tear jerking scene
If you wanna date other people say so
Be prepared for the boy to feel hurt and rejected
Even if you've gone together for only a short time,
And haven't been too serious,
There's still a feeling of rejection
When someone says she prefers the company of others
To your exclusive company,
But if you're honest and direct,
And avoid making a flowery emotional speech when you break the news,
The boy will respect you for your frankness,
And honestly he'll appreciate the kind of straight foward manner
In which you told him your decision
Unless he's a real jerk or a cry baby you will remain friends

I'm head of the class
I'm popular
I'm a quarter back
I'm popular
My mom says I'm a catch
I'm popular
I'm never last picked
I got a cheerleader chick

Being attractive is the most important thing there is
If you wanna catch the biggest fish in your pond
You have to be as attractive as possible
Make sure to keep your hair spotless and clean
Wash it at least every two weeks
Once every two weeks
And if you see Jonnie football hero in the hall
Tell him he played a great game
Tell him you liked his article in the newspaper

I'm the party star
I'm popular
I've got my own car
I'm popular
I'll never get caught
I'm popular
I make football bets
I'm a teachers pet.

I propose we support a one month limit on going steady
I think It will keep people more able to deal with weird situations
And get to know more people
I think if you're ready to go out with Jonnie
Now's the time to tell him about your one month limit
He won't mind he'll apreciate your fresh look on dating
And once you've dated someone else you can date him again
I'm sure he'll like it
Everyone will appreciate it
Your so novel, what a good idea
You can keep your time to your self
You don't need date insurance
You can go out with whoever you want to
Every boy, every boy, in the whole world could be yours
If you'll just listen to my plan
THE TEENAGE GUIDE TO POPULARITY!

I'm head of the class I'm popular
I'm a quarter back I'm popular
My mom says I'm a catch I'm popular
I'm never last picked
I got a cheerleader chick

I'm the party star
I'm popular
I've got my own car
I'm popular
I'll never get caught
I'm popular
I'm a teachers pet.
I make football bets

Post Secret

Don't forget to check Post Secret every Sunday.